Sunsets over Lake Michigan were an unexpected bonus of moving to the west shore of Michigan. Not unexpected in that having access to a wide and expansive vista overlooking the lake is an obvious opportunity to view them, but unexpected in how natural it was to begin to orient around them, to include them as part of the frame of my life. Watching the sunset is a blessing in my day. Calling me out of my old “keeping up with what’s next on the schedule” perspective, this regular, easy access to a sunset has transformed the rhythm and measure of my evening and highlighted a new interest to discover more about the nature of blessings in life.
Blessings, I find, are like sunsets in that they are often unexpected, are a source of wonder, and offer a touch of beauty that can draw forth both a quiet sigh or a sudden gasp. They call us to breathe and integrate them with our lives. They come with connection – carried by events or relationships in which we are called to come present to meet the world, in which we and the world are both touched and refreshed through our engagement, in which we are sometimes stretched and made new, but always invited to become more whole in ourselves.
Now, more than being special events, both sunsets and blessings are becoming touchstones for navigating my days. I want to make more room for both of them in my life.
Let me carry this comparison a bit further. Just like snowflakes, no two sunsets are alike and neither are our experiences of blessing. The louder the sunset’s color, the more likely I am to notice it anywhere, but when I choose to walk to the lakeshore and intentionally quiet and come present, I can pay attention to and appreciate what is less obvious – the subtleties and radiant soft tones that emerge as the light dims. So too, many blessings invite me to notice and stay present to faint nuances in relationships that set the stage for their emergence, challenging me to add my own heart and presence and amplify the opportunities they offer.
The Oxford online dictionary defines a blessing as a favor or protection bestowed by God, or a prayer that is offered before a meal is eaten. So the idea of a blessing carries a spiritual or outside-of-the-ordinary connection. Vocabulary.com also defines it to be an act of approval, like when your roommate wants to move out and you give her your blessings. David Spangler suggests in his book, Blessing: The Art and Practice, that “Blessing is not a technique or a recipe to follow, but a creative and loving act of standing in the blessing of our own life and configuring ourselves to the moment.” Blessing from this perspective emphasizes an act of relationship that is, “a sharing of life/blood and breath that allows a deeper part of us to flow. It affirms the circulation of life and spirit within the world.” By this definition, we too can become an agent of blessing and be the hands and feet that bring it to action.
Given the wide variations of experiences that characterize blessings in our lives, perhaps the best way to identify a blessing is by how it influences us. Though we each might identify what is a blessing event differently, I am noticing there is a common, shared function they accomplish. A blessing is something that liberates us, it helps us to become more of who we are or who we can be. It energizes the release of unexpected potential, catalyzing newness and growth and resetting the conditions in which we function.
I wonder, what do you think of when you hear the word ‘Blessing’? What experiences have you had that affirmed and refreshed the “circulation of life and spirit within your world,” and perhaps catalyzed a new possibility or reset conditions for you?
It was a blessing in my life when my aunts and uncles stepped forward and opened their homes and hearts to include me in their lives after my mother died. More than just a random act of kindness, their commitment to living their values of family and loving connection gave me a safe place to finish high school and earn a scholarship to college. This offering opened new directions and possibilities for me and widened my imagination and experience of what love looked and felt like. They offered a blessing that transformed my life path and trajectory.
I think of another time when going through a divorce and I was sitting on my porch, alone and feeling deeply sad. Uninvited, my dog came out and sat down next to me. It was a blessing moment for me because I could sense she was very conscious of what I was feeling and came specifically to be with me. She wasn’t asking to be petted, she was offering her presence so that I no longer felt alone. She stayed until my sadness shifted. With that touch of loving friendship and caring, I could again breathe with openness toward my life. She extended a small gift of loving attention that had a transformative, restorative, and blessing effect.
These were two of my big “B” blessings which marked major turns of direction or significant gifts of support, but I also recognize many small ‘b’ blessings that fuel my day-to-day interactions. These things often arise unexpectedly and are rooted in our ability to welcome and incorporate unplanned relationships. Like the moment in the fall when the sun lights up the golden maple leaves of the tree outside my house and I stop to link with and appreciate both the tree and the sunlight. Or the sense of community that comes in a smile exchanged with another parent at the park as our children play together and we share in the delight of the moment. Such gifted moments warm me, they filled my life with more joy and vitality, with love and possibility. They are no less transformative than capital “B” blessings because through them I am also transformed, gaining new capacity to meet my day with resilience and appreciation, participating in a shared moment of belonging in the world together.
There is no common look or outcome for a blessing; each blessing situation is unique unto itself in form and result. But every blessing has a shared source in the energy of Love and connectedness, a shared attention to what is needed in the moment, and a shared willingness to stand in and flow with that moment of life and spirit in action. It is in the free, clear gift of loving that a blessing flows to transform, refresh, and make new. We open that possibility by inviting and making the choices to find and nurture the spark of love in ourselves and the world around us.
Blessings, like sunsets, happen regularly; they are not as rare as we might imagine. Stopping to notice their touch in my life, I find they sometimes came as a gracious gift, and other times they included difficult bumps and frictions. All opened wider perspectives and brought courage to flow with the newness of the moment. Blessing is an art we are all naturally practicing whenever we appreciate, honor, respect, and love the sacredness of life within ourselves, within others, and in our living universe. In acting to recognize and bring this spirit of love forward, we are an artist of blessing in the world.